So what do you want to hear about first? My gout or my savings? Or our trip? Man, do I know how to pull the reader in and leave them wanting more or what? Whoo!
Okay, let's start with the gout. Remember a few posts ago where I said I was getting a bunion? Well, I went to the doctor yesterday and he thinks it might be gout.
For those of you who are not overweight old men, gout is a disease that happens to overweight old men. (With all apologies to my father, who is currently quite svelte, but who has gout and had it worse when he weighed more.) What I am SAYING is, gout is this very painful thing where your body can't break down uric acid, whatever that is, and as a result you form these crystals in your body that hang around in your joints.
Now, that sounds like it'd be kind of pretty, doesn't it? Shiny little crystals decorating my joints here and there. How festive!
Yeah, not so much. The doctor asked me if I drank a lot or ate a lot of shellfish. I don't do EITHER! EVER! But those of you who know and love me know I eat like Jethro Bodine on The Beverly Hillbillies. I eat big slabs of red meat, and all sorts of processed fatty fat-fat foods, and so on.
Because it comes from drinking and eating fatty foods, gout is called "The Rich Man's Disease." So you know why I might have this, right? Because I've SAVED ALL THIS MONEY! Now I am rich, so I get rich man's disease.
So to make a dramatic story not so dramatic, the tests came back today and I might just have an inflamed nerve or something. The doctor will tell me more tomorrow. So yelling at my father yesterday for the bad genes was probably unnecessary. Sorry, dad. But I am still mad about when you put Shadow to sleep.
And speaking of being rich, we have distributed our savings and I have laid it out for you on the busy panel to the right of this blog. Since we have been not spending, we have paid our taxes, paid off our credit cards, paid off my car (which I just sold, by the way, to my mother! go, mom!) (we are shipping the dang thing to Michigan. I guess there aren't a lot of cars in Michigan. It's not, like, where they make them or anything. Perhaps mom was just helping us out a bit. Ya think?) and we still have $5,100 in savings.
When the check gets here from sale of the auto, we'll have $5,000 more in savings. Which is pretty exciting, even if it did give me gout.
Finally, I do have to tell you that we're, well, we're going on a vacation starting tomorrow. Now DON'T YELL. A very dear friend is getting married in Cape Cod. I paid for our room there last year already, cause I figured rooms in Cape Cod in July should probably be booked early. When this not-spending thing came around, I thought about not going to this wedding, but you know what? Weddings are once-in-a-lifetime events, and every time I HAVEN'T gone to one, I have regretted it. So I am happily going.
Besides, I have never seen cod wearing capes before.
After the wedding, we are going to Vermont to stay with my Aunt Kathy, and it will be my birthday and our wedding anniversary. Not my wedding anniversary with my Aunt Kathy. With my spouse. Geez.
So, maybe I will blob from Aunt Kathy's, but if I don't, here's Gouty, signing off for now!