Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Free to be Cute and Tweet

Okay, first of all, to my Aunt Mary, Omelet is NOT disgusting. He is just a little featherless, that's all. I'll bet you weren't so cute at two hours old, either.

And to anyone who is worried sick, there seem to be three baby birds in the nest now, and we think we still see the fourth egg underneath them. And they are starting to grow feathers. Aunt Mary. You are very looks-ist, anyone ever tell you that?

It's hard to look in there and/or take more pictures, cause that nest is a flurry of action, with the mom and the dad going back and forth with food. They're schlepping pizzas and Brach's chocolate stars and Orange Crush; you'd be amazed.

I like it that the mom AND the dad are getting involved in the child rearing. Very '70s of them. Very Free to be You and Me. Perhaps later they'll all sit in a circle in the nest and share their feelings. Am I giving away a little too much about how I was raised?

So. My bank statement. To move on to a subject that actually addresses this blog. It used to be, back when I spent money and all, that my bank statement was several pages long. Usually I didn't really look at it. Just made sure there was still money in there, and then I shredded it.

For the past five months, that statement is one page long. It shows deposits from work, transfers to savings, and purchases for gas, grass and ass. (Okay, my Michigan is showing. Am I the only person who remembers people saying "Gas, grass or ass. Nobody rides for free"? Oh, no. What if I was the only person anyone ever SAID this to?) Gas, food and migraine pills, is what I was GOING to say before I started listening to Led Zeppelin and hanging my goat high.

So, it's been exciting to have my bank statement be so simple. Makes me feel all smug. But you know what I discovered yesterday? I discovered that I managed to spend SEVENTY-ONE dollars this month at Try-Not-Ta, the restaurant in my building!! Oh, I knew I had wandered down there once or twice, had me a little snicky-snack, but SEVENTY-ONE DOLLARS worth of snicky-snacking?! If I did that every month, that'd be $852 a year spent in that stupid place. And the food isn't even that good!

So I thought I had better admit it to you, dear reader. Man. Man alive. Man Polly, quit crying. I have got to stop that behavior now.

I will leave you with that promise and one final query:

Must we hear about EVERY hour that Paris Hilton is spending in jail? Really. I know that she ate bread yesterday. Who CARES? Why do I have to know this? Today on my Google home page, which is full of hard-hitting sites like People.com, I read, "Paris had a Good First Night in Jail" and then later "Paris gets a Visit from her Therapist in Jail." Now SERIOUSLY. At this point, I am more well-versed about Paris than Pepe Le Pew. Now THAT, Aunt Mary, is what is disgusting.

16 comments:

dcrmom said...

I agree. Who gives a flying flip about Paris? SHEESH! She's right where she belongs, and I don't need to hear about it.

Anonymous said...

I hestitate to admit this, but the Gilmore Girls remembered it, too.

Rory: I have never seen Grandma so singularly obsessed about a piece of clothing.
Lorelai: Not since I wore my 'Gas, Grass, or Ass - No one rides for free' t-shirt to the junior league spring tea.

June Cutoff Cash said...

See? There was a REASON Gilmore Girls was my only regular show, anonymous.

Anonymous said...

I LOVE Free to be, You and me! I even have the 2 cd disc set AND a signed hardback copy of the book signed by Marilou Henner! JEALOUS MUCH!

June Cutoff Cash said...

Is there seriously a comma after "be," anonymous? As a proofreader, I cannot screw the title up, even in my blog. And also, anon, I am a teeny bit obsessed with Marilu Henner, so yes, jealous a lot.

Peppy Whitemore said...

As much as the exploits of Paris may disgust you or your readers, she is clearly in need of help and this may just be the experience she needs to get through Step 1.

June Cutoff Cash said...

Well, I agree with that, Peppy Whitemore. It is actually at this point not even her FAULT that we have to hear so much about her.

Lisa said...

UM, anon, do you mean it was signed be Marlo Thomas? If not, what does Marilou have to do with Free To Be?

June Cutoff Cash said...

I was thinking maybe Marlilu Henner had something to do with a later version of said fine production. Maybe anon DID mean Marlo Thomas and not Marilu Henner.

Oh, the important discussions this blog stimulates...

Stie said...

Have to weigh in on the Paris thing...she DROVE DRUNK. She's in jail. I don't care if it's hard on her or if she went in wearing her most-MTV Movie Awards makeup. UGH. Enough already!

Kelly Garrett said...

I knew that I felt right at home here on this blog. The Gilmore Girls are angels. Lorelai inspired my love of black coffee and Rory has inspired me to read the classics. Emily and Richard inspire me to act like a total tool when it is totally inappropriate.

Kelly Garrett said...

Just to clear, Paris Hilton was NOT drunk. It was not a DWI, it was a DUI. People can be eligible for a DUI and not be drunk or even buzzed. As a former policewoman, I know this.

sabrina duncan said...

I too was wondering what Marilu had to do with Free To Be. I don't think that she does. It's Marlo all the way. I had the album and I used to play it and sing LOUDLY. I'm sure my parents loved it. Well, my dad probably didn't care. WHAT?!!

Nancy said...

didja see Paris got out of jail???

June Cutoff Cash said...

Yes. Did you know there is no such thing as a, quote, nervous breakdown, unquote? WHATEVER with her spoiled self and those who enable her.

i'm not lisa said...

Hey...I have the Free To Be You And Me on CD and it is Marlo Thomas. The New Seekers is the name of the band that sings that song...and they also sang the Coca Cola song, "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing."