It's exactly 6 a.m. and I am typing this in the dark cause Marvin Gardens is still asleep. Winston, our wonderful yet ridiculous cat, is sitting on top of the computer, hanging his head down to watch the cursor. He looks like Snoopy's impression of a vulture.
I thought I had better admit something: we have cheated a few times recently. On Friday, Marvin had a nasty flu, and I went to the store to get him some cough medicine -- medicine is allowed. But I also got him McDonald's, which he asked for. And who am I to turn down someone with a fever? So then of course I had to get McDonald's too.
And you know it wasn't very good? After all that lusting and obsessing. It was like finding out that Jude Law wasn't that charming. The staff was really disorganized, the fries were cold and there was too much secret sauce on my Big Mac. I actually called the 1800 number to complain. I do that a lot. I am the queen of the complain-y email or call. I get it from my grandmother. It's genetic.
Then yesterday Marvin Gardens bought me a gift -- it's a Pimp My Cubicle set, so I can decorate my walls at work with a disco ball, leopard wallpaper, and even a computer key that reads "bling." The higher-ups will sure to be impressed, for shizzle.
Oh, and also, I got home really late Monday, and honest to God forgot to make coffee and lunch for the next day, and then I didn't wake up till 6:24, which gave me a stunning 21 minutes to get ready, so I am afraid I bought my lunch at Tri-not-ta as well.
My officemate and I were joking that he was going to hack into my blog and tell you all the truth, but as you can see, I have beat him to it. You all have been so supportive with your gift certificates and recipes and dicers, there is no way I could leave you out of the ugly side. I am sure we are back on track now. For shizzle.
Eh. Everyone is allowed a lapse every now and again. I've had my fair share. Although thanks to several hundred dollars in Christmas money and a few random ebay sales, I've been able to cover all my cheating with money that doesn't really count. When that runs out, I'll be up shizzle creek. ;-)
ReplyDeleteA freind of mine stopped eating McD's, with the words "it doesn't make any less hungery, it just makes you feel different."
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